Return to the Sucking Vortex

The World Wide Rant's Andy writes of Montgomery County investigating an occupational tax of 1.5% on all salaries. Actually, Jefferson County (where Birmingham is located) has had one for years, though it's only 1%. It is pretty loathsome. Jefferson attempts to justify it because so many Birmingham workers don't live in the county but commute from Shelby or Walker (or increasingly, Tuscaloosa or Bibb) counties. The real problem is at the state level, though. The tax system in this state is so screwed up that local officials don't see any problem with screwing with it more. If Andy does want to do some consulting, how about starting on Goat Hill and seeing if they'll fix the income tax structure?

Bangkok Post Sunday 14 July 2002 - Police save pangolins

According to this, pangolins are also called "scaly anteaters", though they're not closely related to anteaters or armadillos. Anyway, they don't look particularly yummy.

Department of Unfair Analogies

Bangladeshis Sipping Arsenic as Plan for Safe Water Stalls

They shouldn't worry, President Bush says that's safe.

CNN.com - German report: Bin Laden alive - July 13, 2002

Huh. Anyone else have the feeling that we're going to be hearing this sort of thing for the next few decades?

Suicide bomb faction thanks Cherie Blair for Palestinian 'ray of reality'

Hamas loves Cherie!

Explosion in Pakistan Injures 13 (washingtonpost.com)

Mostly German tourists. It's the third explosion that's injured or killed foreigners in Pakistan since March, and I wonder if they're being targeted.

Nile virus in northern part of state

Well, it's been there, and in the southern part of state, but not in the central part of the state where I am. I'm sure we're safe, but I'm staying indoors for the rest of the summer just in case.

Few mothers aware law allows them to leave unwanted newborns with hospitals

Huh. The law allows for anonymous dropoffs at hospitals. I don't know how I feel about that, but it's better than what some desperate mothers try to pull.

State keeps snakehead fish away

Finally, a local angle! Alabama conservation officers discovered the importation 200 Dreaded Chinese Snakehead Walking Fish back in November. 24 pet store owners faced the oh-so-stiff fine of $50 for selling them; I can't tell if anyone faced penalties for bringing them into the state illegally. Alabama is a pretty river-intensive state, and there's a significant sport-fishing industry, so they were kind of concerned aboutthe possibility of a ravenous predator eating all the bass.

Fulton firefighters inspire line of action figures

Hey, this is kind of neat. A Georgia company is releasing what it calls the "Local Heroes" line of action figures, starting with three Atlanta-area firefighters.

Reuters Wire | 07/13/2002 | Hizbollah leader says group not linked to Al Qaeda

Well, that's a relief. I wouldn't want to think Hezbollah was linked to terrorists or anything... Actually, it's kind of interesting. Even terrorists don't want to have anything to do with Osama now.

Dinsdale?

Suburban Britain roused in defence of 5,000 hedgehogs

The Brits love hedgehogs. The Scottish government wants to kill off the hedgehogs of the Outer Hebrides to protect the birds living there. Animal rights enthusiasts want to capture them and move them to England to hunt slugs. (Really.)

"We have an army of volunteers willing to travel to the islands to pick up the animals and transport them back to the mainland," Les Stocker of St Tiggywinkles said.

St. Tiggywinkles?

IOL : Flesh-eating fish stalks US residents

Our Dreaded Chinese Snakehead Walking Fish of Maryland roundup continues in South Africa, where they're making it sound like the DCSWF/M actually is coming into our homes to strangle us in our beds. Not that I'd rule that out, but there haven't been any reports as yet.

The Scotsman - International - Alien fish danger

Nothing new here (except as I understand it, this guy wasn't exactly a "pet owner", he originally bought the DCSWF/M for someone to eat) but again, "Alien fish danger" would be a good name for a band.

The Worst Spam Ever
In its entirety:

Dear Sir or madam,
Our company is a manufacturer of many kinds of clocks and hardware.
Welcome to look at our company's website.http://www.dmie.com
If you have any questions please send us an E-mail:info@dmie.com
DAI MING INTERNATIONAL ENTERPRISES

I swear, they aren't even trying anymore.

All things snakehead conquer community

Well, it is the Greatest Story Ever. I figure Crofton is this close to changing its name to "Snakehead", which would be a great idea. I do feel sorry for the 11-year-old fisherman who's already figured out that this is going to be the highlight of his life.

Mrs Mubarak hails libraries' role in nurturing young readers

I mean, some kids can't afford a copy of Mein Kampf or the Protocols of the Elders of Zion. Did you know that Hosni Mubarak's wife is named Suzanne?

ajc.com | Living | Could Mr. Right be white?

Knowing white men as I do, that seems unlikely... In general, I'm in favor of interracial marriage. You know, only a few years ago there were still counties in Alabama that tried to enforce statutes against it, that simply wouldn't issue a marriage license to a mixed couple? My people!

Arabs Voice Protest in Rap Music

Israeli Arabs, in fact. This can't be good. As a rule, nothing involving rap is ever good.

Kylie banned in Malaysia - theage.com.au

They also banned an Ally McBeal episode, which I'm down with, and a fine episode of Friends, "The One With the Video Tape". Apparently, these cause crime. Malaysia's government has some odd beliefs, rather similar to those of Jerry Falwell.

The Friends episode really throws me, because by that show's standards it's awfully tame. If they banned that, they'd have to keep out the entirety of the last two seasons. And wait until they see Will & Grace!

White House Faulted Over Manatees (washingtonpost.com)

Once again, a court is asking the White House to do the unthinkable and actually enforce the Endangered Species Act. I'm sick and tired of this, really. If they don't like the ESA, try to get it repealed. (Really. I mean it. I'd love to see you try.) As for L'il Brother Jeb, he should just come out and say that he's in favor driving motorboats at high speeds everywhere and if the manatees get chopped into hamburger it's their fault for not evolving a deep-water lifestyle. We'll be sure to see some movement in the polls then!

Yahoo! News - Jerry Springer Show TV's Worst Ever

I probably would have chosen the fifth-place show Hogan's Heroes ("Hey, let's make a sitcom about a POW camp in Nazi Germany!") but it's hard to argue.

Ferrets back from the 'dead' - JULY 13, 2002

AAIIEEE!!!! Undead ferrets!

The black-footed ferret had been considered extinct at one time. It's making a comeback, thanks in part to artificial insemination.

Mercury News | 07/12/2002 | Joint European-Russian venture launches solar sail prototype

All right... Eventually, they want to launch one into space. For a TV program, naturally.

The Nando Times: American-born Taliban suspect can't meet lawyer, appeals court says

Not even public defenders. It doesn't sound very constitutional to me.

The appeals court was not swayed by the public defender's argument that Hamdi, as a U.S. citizen, has a constitutional right to legal representation.

Scalia disciples, I assume.

Northport employee unlikely to receive disciplinary action

My tax dollars at work: Timothy Thomas had city personnel use city equipment to pave his driveway on city time. But he's going to pay the city back, so it's okay. (Not for the employees' time, just $194 for the expenses.) Oh, and his uncle is on the City Council, but I'm sure that has nothing to do with him keeping his job.

NEWS.scotsman.com - Latest News - Nazi Symbols Daubed on Synagogue

In Wales this time. That's not the worst of it. The bastards also destroyed some valuable (perhaps irreplaceable?) scrolls, then tried unsuccessfully to torch the place. I can't take this.

Cow urine Aids 'cure'

Great, you have AIDS, and someone sells you cow pee at twelve bucks a bottle. I presume you have to drink it. Why are people so gullible? I'm certainly not restricting that to overseas; see the "New type of water is said to be better than regular water" article, where one of the rip-off artists operates out of my hometown.

Ananova - Men found dead in cow manure pit

Gosh, I hope they were dumped there. That would be an awful place to die. I certainly hope they didn't drown in the stuff.

CNN Programs - Larry King Live

Tonight:
You may know him as Bo Duke of "The Dukes of Hazzard" or as a top Christian music singer, but John Schneider has a secret he's never revealed -- until now. Tune in for this Larry King Live exclusive.

It isn't that his adoptive son is a superpowered orphan from another planet, is it?

Great Moments in Misleading Headline Writing

USATODAY.com - Court: Net posting not considered libel

That's not what the court said, and what it said is more important; that lawsuits for libel on internet postings must be filed in the state where they were posted. A scholar living in Alabama had sued over statements made by a Minnesota woman, and won a declaratory judgment here when the Minnesotan said Alabama didn't have jurisdiction. The Minnesota Supreme Court agrees.

I am not an attorney, of course, but that seems like the proper ruling. Not that people don't go venue shopping all the time, but if I say something in Alabama about someone in Minnesota (to turn the case on its head) it doesn't seem right that he can sue me in Minnesota. I've never even been to Minnesota.

Ananova - Whisky leaks from disillery as bosses discuss beer seepage

From bad to worse, I guess. They lost more than 1500 gallons of whisky into a stream a week after nearly 10000 gallons of beer was flushed into that same stream. Whatever fish survived were described as "very happy".

Int'l Labor Organization to set up fund for jobless Palestinians

Words fail me. It's a UN agency, of course.

No Major League team in danger of going bankrupt

See, this is what I mean. Bud Selig = pathological liar. Never believe anything he says, or anything anyone under his authority says. It's all a pack of lies.

Oregon woman fights off determined bear in Alaska

The bear, described as gaunt and thin (was it sick?) stalked Kristy Abbott for more than an hour. The bear bit and clawed her before she fought it off with a stick. Representatives of the European Union denounced Abbott for the excessive use of force in fighting off a bear that was only acting naturally. Well, no, but it's the sort of thing they would do.

CNN.com - Shocked: 99 alien fish snagged in pond - July 12, 2002

Yikes. Apparently the Dreaded Chinese Snakehead Walking Fish reproduce like bunnies, only more so.

"We've said all along that if there are juveniles in there, there would be hundreds or thousands of them," agency spokesman John Surrick said Friday.

Thousands? We're gonna need a bigger boat.

Head: Season 7 Buffy's Last

The good news is that Anthony Stewart Head says he's going to appear in more episodes this season.

Bush to give economic address at UAB

Dubya will be in Birmingham Monday. Just to make sure, if anything happens, I will be at work, in Tuscaloosa, on Monday. Don't come looking for me... That litter of babies is at the UAB hospital by the way. Let's see if the President drops by to stroke them.

Trainee rabbi's dismembered body found

Andreas Hinz, a gay trainee rabbi from Germany went missing in London July 2. Was he killed for being Jewish? For being gay? For money? My guess is gay.

Mandela calls for AIDS drugs for all

Sounds good to me. Doesn't sound too good to the drug companies, I'll bet. Hey, I understand their position. They do have to profit heavily on these drugs, that's what drives research. But AIDS, a disease that could depopulate entire countries, is something different. I mean, if they make obscene profits off of Viagra, more power to them, but we're talking the very existence of some nations.

Scientist questions skull theory

French scientists think that the skull whose discovery was announced the other day is not a primitive hominid but an ancestral female gorilla. (I could make a joke here about Frenchwomen's toiletry habits but I will demur.) I have no opinion here, since they all know a lot better than I. I do find it interesting that either the French doesn't have different words for "ape" and "monkey" or this article's translation is faulty.

If he's not dead, Osama's happy

Spain, EU Protest Island Takeover (washingtonpost.com)

Morocco sent a couple of soldiers to set up a flag on a small uninhabited island off the Moroccan coast, one claimed by Spain (which has a couple of Hong Kong-style enclaves in Morocco). The Spanish are all hot and bothered about this. Meanwhile, the Spanish are moving closer to joint control of Gibraltar, which does have people on it, none of whom want to be Spanish. It's not exactly hypocritical, but it's along those lines.

Hackers Alter USA Today's Web Site (washingtonpost.com)

Hackers penetrated USA Today's Web site, replacing legitimate news stories on its home page and six other pages with phony stories riddled with spelling errors.

Wait... They found legitimate news stories on the USA Today site? Now, that's news.

Palestinians: Israel must not try jailed Tanzim leader Barghouti

From what I can tell, they're saying that the Israelis can't try any Palestinian for anything. Well, that's original.

Boston.com / Latest News / Business / Tomato pies recalled for undeclared milk

Tomato pie? Yuck. I like tomatoes, but they're not a pie ingredient... Oh, I see, this is a northern thing. Pizza without cheese. What's the point?

Research Council Urges NASA to Go to Pluto

Basically, I guess, because it's the only place we haven't been yet.

Pig organs for human transplantation soon

Those wacky Australians are at it again!

Lazy fish get exercise regime

For instance, walking fish are now jogging fish... No, no. What happened is that eventually, even fish will learn. And archer fish in a London aquarium figured out they're going to get fed anyway, so have stopped their usual hunting style.

Yes, this blog is getting increasingly fishcentric. I don't know, I just think fish are interesting. Still don't like to eat them.

It turns out that Larry Simon is a Norse God. Who knew?

Another ecological invasion story...

Big Asian Carp Said to Threaten Great Lakes

While "Big Asian Carp" would be a good name for a band, I don't think this is nearly as neat as the Dreaded Chinese Snakehead Walking Fish of Maryland.

Water shortage due to less rain: DJB - The Times of India

Well, yeah.

NASA report calls for reorganization

An advisory panel wants the agency to focus more on research and "cutting edge" science. In particular, they shouldn't cut the research budget when the space station goes over budget. Again.

CNN.com - China Post offers email... sort of - July 11, 2002

The Chinese post office is going to hand-deliver email. This has to be a joke, right? They're just trying to get back at us for that Onion thing. Has to be.

Snakehead Fish Were Dumped Into Pond, Officials Say (washingtonpost.com)

It turns out that some guy dumped the Dreaded Chinese Snakeheaded Walking Fish of Maryland into the pond in which they've been caught. (They "got too big for the aquarium".) Of course, it turned out one was male and one female, and voila, ecological crisis. And the statute of limitations has expired (it was two years) so no punishment is forthcoming. It seems to me that this particular SoL is perfectly designed so that by the time we find out a foreign species has established itself nobody can be punished.

AP Wire | 07/11/2002 | Italy's Male Royals May Return

The Italian Parliament has lifted the ban on the House of Savoy and will let them return to the country. Great, now maybe they could get to work on overturning their blasphemy laws and otherwise generally getting with the 19th Century while the 21st is still in its infancy.

Nepotism in the White House!

West Wing star Martin Sheen is to earn more than £2 million for the next series of the White House drama... His deal with US network NBC also includes guaranteed days off every week during filming, an office suite on set and a role for his daughter Renee Estevez, the New York Post reported.

Renee's been hanging around the show, but she never gets any lines to speak of. Guess that's going to change.

New type of water is said to be better than regular water

Hey, pseudoscience in my hometown!

Penta water [is] produced in California by Bio-Hydration Research Lab Inc., and Energy Water [is] produced in Northport by a local chiropractor.

In its literature, Penta claims that its technology reduces water to its purest state by reducing the size of the H20 molecule clusters in water so they can move more rapidly through the body. According to Penta, the body can absorb the water faster and more completely than regular water.

I don't understand why claims like this are legal. What is the FDA for?

UPDATE: JC sends me to this James Randi commentary that deals in part with the Penta water people. (Second item.) Randi is great, of course. These quacks are not, and I reiterate, why are they allowed to sell this stuff?

CNN.com - Liquidmetal is super strong - July 10, 2002

I'm trying to figure out an appropriate "Terminator" joke here, but I'm coming up blank.

AP Wire | 07/11/2002 | 5,000 in U.S. May Have al-Qaida Ties

What is this, a "six degrees of separation" thing? ("Abdullah knows Omar, Omar knows Hassan, and Hassan once met Osama.") Not that 5000 in a nation of 300 million is that many, but the government is really stretching things here.

Japan Scientists Hope for Outback Superjet Launch

They're trying for a new-generation supersonic jet -- remember, the Concorde is over thirty years old -- which could fly over the Pacific and do it in four hours. It'll take a while, but if they can it will get my highest accolade -- cool.

Reuters Wire | 07/11/2002 | China Offers Kabul Pigs in Latest Goodwill Gesture

For the zoo. Apparently, the idea is that to the Afghans, pigs are an exotic animal and they'll flock to see it. I don't know. There are some more standard zoo animals -- bears, wolves, peacocks -- headed there as well.

Cheney praises Arthur Andersen in video

Things aren't looking too good for Uncle Dick right about now. Here's a good bit:

"One of the things I like that they do for us is that, in effect, I get good advice, if you will, from their people based upon how we're doing business and how we're operating, over and above the, just sort of the normal by-the-books audit arrangement.

By all rights, that line oughtta come back to haunt him.

CNN.com - Gadhafi: 'Libya is against terrorism' - July 11, 2002

Yeah, right.

The Nando Times: Israel to put senior Palestinian leader on trial

Oh, this should be fun.

Is that a chameleon you're wearing? - JULY 11, 2002

Airline security may not be able to keep you from bringing a gun on board, but hey, they're keeping dangerous lizards out.

Bush Calls for End to Loans of a Type He Once Received

Really, what more can I add to that?

Department of DUH

The Nando Times: Appalachia lags in telecommunications, study finds

Yes, West Virginia, there is a digital divide.

The Nando Times: Group set to unveil new Web ID standard

Doesn't it make you feel all cuddly? Think of it: Hackers, instead of having to break into lots of different badly designed security systems, will have to break into only one. Really, it'll make everything much easier on all of us.

The Nando Times: Company acknowledges flaw in popular e-mail encrypting program

Hey, PGP has a flaw that "could allow hackers to attack a user's computer and, in some circumstances, unscramble messages". Oopsie!

Microsoft immediately announced a research program to figure out who's stealing their security flaws.

He's Lying.

How can I tell Bud Selig is lying? His lips are moving.

CNNSI.com - Baseball - Selig claims team might not make payroll - Wednesday July 10, 2002 10:17 PM

Bud Selig: Giving used-car salesmen a bad name since 1970.

CNN.com - Gnutella developer dies in apparent suicide - July 10, 2002

Wow. Gene Kan was only 25.

Charles has updated his post. Nothing much more to add, except that (as I indicated in an email to him) he's more or less correct about the "us versus them" attitude of my post. When it comes to violence, the real battle is the center versus the extremes on both sides. I tend to think that (in the United States, anyway) the extreme right is both more powerful and more violent.

Misleading Moments in Headline Writing

USATODAY.com - Italian police shut down U.S.-based porn sites

The sites in question were hosted in the US but created by an Italian in Italy. Also, they were shut down less because of pornography than for blasphemy. Italy still has anti-blasphemy laws, but we're the ones who have backward social attitudes. Go figure.

Forbes.com: VeriSign warns on second-quarter earnings, revs

Yeah, sure would be awful if VeriSign went broke. Yup.

Bob Jones names building after Zompa

The story (about a high school auditorium) is completely uninteresting. I just like the headline. Zompa!

Neelley parole is weighed

In 1982, when she was 17, Judith Ann Neeley and her husband (okay, get the Alabama jokes out of the way now) tortured another teenage girl to death. She was in line to be executed three years ago, when Fob James, Governor and Moron, commuted her sentence to life in prison. She now is saying she should be eligible for parole; the state says her parole eligibility should start when her sentence was commuted. I don't see how that can work. I also don't see how anyone could consider her a good parole candidate, but strange things happen when female prisoners get involved. Even if she's released, though, she's got a life sentence to serve in Georgia for a murder there.

House OKs Bill to Arm Airline Pilots (washingtonpost.com)

With far more than enough votes to override a veto, if Bush dared veto it. But I'm betting it dies in committee in the Senate.

Charles Austin has responded to my post on several other people's posts... well you get the idea. On the great left-wing political violence epidemic that going to be started because Media Whores Online asks its readers to send polite emails to media people.

I will agree with Charles that it's unfair to tag the "right" with blame for people like Eric Rudolph and Tim McVeigh. But that's exactly the whole point of Mickey "I swear, I'm a Democrat" Kaus is trying to do -- even though there hasn't been any left-wing political violence to speak of in the United States.

And yes, you can lay "people deprived of medical advances or genetically improved rice at the feet of the Luddites", but don't blame us for the Luddites. Ludditism is a disease that affects the whole political spectrum.

CNN.com - Ancient skull challenges human origins - July 10, 2002

Not exactly. It's not like they're saying humans actually evolved from chickens or something. Basically, they think (remember, this is one skull) that humans and chimpanzees may have diverged earlier than previously thought. Did you know that humans and chimpanzees are more closely related (in time, anyway) than either is to any other ape? It's true.

4th Shuttle Has Cracked Fuel Line (washingtonpost.com)

Well, that makes for the clean sweep. Unless they decide that it's safe to fly with the cracks (they've been doing so already, for certain) the shuttle fleet will be grounded for months while they make replacements.

Atrios (yeah, yeah, no permalinks, sigh) has the details on the Mighty Casio that I'm one of the smaller keys on the right side of.

Al-Qaida spokesmen say terror group planning new attacks against America

Yawn. You guys are so done.

A key al-Qaida spokesman has made a new threat to attack American targets and urged Muslims the world over to "kill enemies of God everywhere."

He should start with himself.

Where do you go after you've made a Bobby Knight movie? Bear Bryant, of course.

Afghanistan to Allocate Bulk of Budget to Education

Hamid Karzai sounds like... well, Walter Mondale or somebody:

There should be a cut from all the ministry budgets, especially from defense, interior and intelligence... The money should go on health and education.

The ministers for Defense and Interior were there at the time, but they aren't saying how they feel about this. Oh, and girls, like the ones pictured, are attending school again. I really hope Karzai can pull this off, but I'm not optimistic.

Sextuplets getting stronger every day, doctor says

Feh. It's still not normal.

The babies can't yet be held, but doctors have encouraged the parents to stroke or gently touch them.

You know, like kittens or puppies, or anything else born in litters.

All the Harris babies have names beginning with the letter K, after their great-grandmother, Kassie Harris. Their names are Kiera Christine, Kaylynne Antoinett, Kaleb Reddrick, Kobe Byshari, Kieran Anthony and Kyle Jacob.

It just gets worse. I hate parents who do that. "Kaylynne Antoinett"?

ESPN.com: MLB - MLB All-Star Game 2002

You have to love a game that ends with Bud Selig being booed.

'Son of Sam' Killer David Berkowitz Denied Parole on First Try (washingtonpost.com)

Man, I really thought he'd get it. Better luck next time, Dave. Maybe he and Manson and Sirhan can start a club.

BBC News | AFRICA | Elderly 'witches' persecuted in Mozambique

Sounds like a fun place. Some people die of AIDS, and everyone looks for the closest old woman to blame it on. They're helped along by traditional "healers", whom I'd guess would prefer nobody look that closely at them.

Professor Ricardo Duarte believes there are victims but, in general, the traditional healers "do more good than harm".

Duarte -- an ethnologist and not a physician -- probably hasn't had his house burned down by his drunken son who was told by a "healer" that Professor Duarte was causing the son's impotence. Or been exiled from his home into a famine-stricken region for cursing people with HIV.

This is a mean-spirited post, but I hate people of this stripe -- faith healers, witch doctors, "spiritual healers" of the oh-so-badly-named "Christian Science" movement. All of them. There was a time when this sort of thing had its place, but we know better now.

news.telegraph.co.uk - Divine mystery of leaking water at Wailing Wall

Sages across the Holy Land were yesterday trying to fathom the significance of a mysterious damp patch that has appeared on Jerusalem's Wailing Wall.

My guess is that Rabbi Levi Lau is closer to the truth: "Instead of looking for a spiritual explanation it would be better to ask the Israeli Water Authority."

Seven baby fish feared to be snakeheads

Yes, the Dreaded Chinese Snakeheaded Walking Fish of Maryland has reproduced. Apparently Wile E. Coyote has been brought in to deal with the problem:

State officials have closed the 9-acre pond to the general public and are setting up a panel to consider remedies. One possibility is stunning all the fish in the pond with electricity, then scooping them up as they float to the surface, officials said.

If that fails, they're considering dynamite, or possibly a small atomic bomb. There's also a video of the DCSWF/M. I love this story.

The Nando Times: Investigation of 1941 massacre of Jews in Poland closes

Swift justice, huh?

No charges filed. While it's unlikely many perpetrators are still alive, anyone who believes that the only guilty parties were Nazis and a few Poles the Soviet puppet government convicted in '49 is fooling themselves.

CNN.com - Bush's Thompson booed at AIDS conference - July 9, 2002

Imagine, Bush appointed a right-wing, anti-gay, pro-"Abstinence Education" man -- in other word, your standard-issue Republican -- and AIDS activists booed him. I guess this is some of that left-wing violence they're talking about.

Hee.

Yahoo! News - Portland to Pay Homage to Andersen

The AAA baseball Portland (OR) Beavers are having "Arthur Andersen Appreciation Night" July 18; anyone named "Arthur" or "Andersen" gets in free, and they're asking fans to bring old documents to be shredded.

UPDATE: Charles Austin informs me that Pacific Gas & Electric owns the stadium in which the Beavers played. PG&E is a subsidiary of Enron.

UPDATE UPDATE: It turns out it's owned by Portland General Electric, PGE, not PG&E. Oh, well, it got me a good laugh.

Silicon Valley of Bronze Age unearthed near Dead Sea
Researchers say site is amazingly preserved and undisturbed

How is it that in 2700 BC, Jordan could be the most advanced place on Earth, and now it's, well, Jordan?

Partner swapping comes out of closet
Today's partner swapping is more upscale, perhaps more accepted

Maybe in California. I wouldn't suggest trying it around here.

I post on things I don't understand all the time, so maybe I shouldn't judge, but any amount of research at all could have told Tim Blair that Major League Baseball players aren't striking for more money, but (if they do strike, which seems much less likely than it did a week ago) will do so to protect the status quo. I thought Blair was a capitalist, but I've noticed lots of capitalists don't seem to have any problem with salary controls for athletes.

LAX Shooter linked to bin Laden?

Good thing this was an isolated incident, and not terrorism!

Basically, this is the same stuff that most anyone reading this probably has already come across, linking Hadayet to Egyptian Jihad.

ajc.com | Business | Stewart creating show for CNN International

Jon Stewart is going to do "The Daily Show: Global Edition". It won't be available in the US. I also see that "Golden said Stewart has not been told to avoid controversies such as the Middle East, but CNN International will have veto rights over what it airs." In other words, they're going to cut anything critical of Yasser & Company to avoid offending terrorist sympathisers.

AP Wire | 07/09/2002 | Gunman kills Arab outside Jerusalem

Shoddy... Some Palestinian loser opens fire, kills one guy who isn't even Jewish, then runs. He did wound a police officer, but still...

Spam Spam Spam Spam...

Did anyone else get an email in Hebrew from some guy looking for a job? I got two.

ArabNews: Defuse the time bomb in Makkah

The Saudis and the Klan are increasingly indistinguishable. Check out this piece of bile. Saudi Arabian Hate: It's not just for Jews anymore!

(Via DC Thornton.)

Kevin Raybould responds to Instapundit and Kaus and their latest left-bashing. I agree... well, maybe not one-hundred percent, but at least 95. When the American "left" (defined, it seems, as anyone from Bill Clinton on) produces a Rudolph or a McVeigh (and no, the Unabomber was not a leftist) then we'll talk.

Candidates ask Justice Dept. to monitor polls

I used to live and vote in Bessemer, and I never saw anything funny going on. But I'm noted for being pretty unobservant about that sort of thing. Bessemer politics is probably no more or less corrupt than most.

Center Point woman has sex

Wow, must have been a slow news day. Oh, wait, there's more:

Center Point woman has sextuplets

That's better. Well, not really. I still maintain that humans are not meant to give birth to litters.

ScienceDaily Magazine -- Deformed Frogs Form When Parasites And Pesticides Combine

Poor frogs. The science apparently shows that both pesticides and a type of parasite are needed to cause the deformities that have shown in frogs the last couple of decades.

Israel will sell El Al to private investors

Kind of awkward timing, this... I hadn't realized that El Al took the Sabbath off. This story blames the airline's losses on that, at least in part. It'll be interesting to see if these investors follow that.

Saddam Hussein's stepson deported to New Zealand

I think we've decided he's just a nitwit and not a terrorist.

Hasselhoff Checks Into Rehab Center

Millions of Germans are in mourning.

New Marshall lab to make sci-fi real

I hate that word... A new NASA propulsion research lab is being built in Huntsville. They say that they're working on (among other things) antimatter, which makes one a little nervous. But what the heck.

Wife of slain suspect in LAX shootout says husband is innocent

I'm sorry for this woman's tragedy (sorry, that is, that she married a homicidal maniac, not that the homicidal maniac is dead) but obviously she has no personal knowledge of the events of July 4. Given her personal feelings in the matter, there is no reason to take her statement seriously.

As for the rest of this story: "Wah, Americans don't like Arabs! Wah, we're all suspects! I moved back to Egypt and brought my sons even though they don't speak Arabic, but that wasn't to keep them out of the way while my husband got ready to kill Jews!"

Merck Shares Fall on Worries About Accounting at Medco Unit

Another day, another giant corporation in an accounting scandal. Yawn. No word on who their outside auditors were, but I don't see the A-word.

EU braces for battle over agriculture reform - 08 Jul 2002

Guess who's against reform: The French! What are the odds? They get half of the EU's agricultural subsidies.

Philadelphia Inquirer | 07/08/2002 | U.S. sweeps mall kiosks, hunting for terror clues

The FBI and INS (the two incompetent law enforcement agencies that are more incompetent together!) are checking mall jewelry kiosks operating as "Intrigue Jewelers". The suspicion is that it's a money-laundering operation for terrorists. Intrigue has an odd spread of markets: Pennsylvania, Florida, California, Alabama, Georgia and North Carolina.

Talking Points Memo: by Joshua Micah Marshall

Yeah, yeah, yeah, and Bush Is Toast.

Area Parking Perks Keep More Cars on Road, Experts Say (washingtonpost.com)

Wow, cheap parking makes people more likely to drive? I never would have guessed.

The dreadful human toll of karaoke.

Yes, that is mean, but I allow myself one really mean link every day.

Black twins born to whites in IVF mix-up

Great, the world is a bad Saturday Night Live skit.

eBay buying online payment provider PayPal for $1.5 billion

Congratulations to the proprietors of PayPal, who have cashed in. I suppose you still can, as long as you make money.

Weblogs.Com really needs to do something about the jerk who keeps submitting sites like CNN.com and Yahoo to the "Recently Changed Weblogs" list.

The Modesto Bee has found some stories written by a Davis High School senior in 1994.

Young Chandra recalls family outing
By CHANDRA LEVY
SENIOR, DAVIS HIGH SCHOOL

Pathetic Moments In Headline Writing

Lipscomb tells 90-year-old nay to having horses in city

That's barely even a pun.

I used to drive through Lipscomb (which isn't much of a city; it's an elderly industrial suburb) and it's not really horse country. But if a guy has had horses there for 75 years, it's hardly fair to tell him to get rid of them now. But that's the plan, as soon as they're sure it's against the law.

City Council President Helen Pettigrew said she believed the city had a law prohibiting livestock from being kept in the city limits.

But Pettigrew said city officials have been unable to locate the binder containing the city's ordinances.

Having once spent a year there one evening paying a speeding ticket, that pretty well matches my impression of the Lipscomb City Hall.

Ebbers Tried to Cut WorldCom Audit Budget -Source

Really, doesn't that make a lot of sense? It's not like Worldcom's auditors were doing such a great job, even if Andersen gets the primary blame.

Mike Tyson gives a bride away

I know that if I were getting married and the bride had Tyson give her away, I'd be a little nervous.

CNN.com - Bush to get tough on corporate abuse - July 8, 2002

President Bush is expected to call for criminal penalties -- including jail time -- for corporate leaders who knowingly misreport their company's earnings.

"Boy, that pesky rule against ex post facto laws sure is gonna come in handy for me and Dick," he won't add, but will think.

New Zealand News - World - Barrels of Beaujolais destined for vinegar

I am not a wine guy. I mean, I drink a little occasionally, but it all tastes pretty much the same to me. But seeing (a) French wineries forced to sell their products for vinegar at about two dollars a gallon, and (b) the French share of the wine market plummeting... Well, I feel all warm inside. Is it possible that when they came up with "schadenfreude", the Germans were looking west? Heck, it's probably likely.

Jeez, somebody go cheer Dave Tepper up!

City out of 10 deadliest

Birmingham fell to 11th in murders per capita. I'm at a loss; Birmingham is always in the top ten!

CNN.com - Russia proposes joint effort to conquer Mars - July 7, 2002

Somehow, I think "joint" is the operative word here. Russia isn't exactly a technological juggernaut. Also, they say they'll contribute $6 billion towards a $20 billion cost of the project. Where are they going to find $6 billion?

"It must be an international project," said Vitaly Semyonov, head of the Mars project at the M.V. Keldysha Space Research Center. "No one country could cope alone with this task."

Ahem. Well, we'd have to shake down Congress, but we could do it. We'd have to do it anyway, since there's no way we'd trust Russian rocketry with our astronauts.

In Iowa, There's Not Always Room for Jello

Iowa has banned pre-packaged Jell-O shots. Once again, Alabama was way ahead of them. The stated reason is the appearance of the packaging, which is similar to that of kids' snacks.

Fields of shame

You think the bloggers were tough on those backcountry Pakistanis who gang raped a girl and the "judges" who ordered it, check out this guy.

BBC News | HEALTH | Fishy diet may cut hunger hormone

Either if you eat lots of fish there's a decline in a hormone that makes you hungry, or you just get sick of fish.

Guardian Unlimited Observer | International | Earth 'will expire by 2050'

Supposedly, the World Wildlife Fund says that the world will run out of resources and we'll have to colonize outer space within fifty years. There are several obvious problems with the methodology, but hey, if it gets people thinking about colonizing space it's all worth it.

Have You Seen This Fish?

You know the Dreaded Chinese Snakehead Walking Fish has made it big when Maureen Dowd herself writes of it.

Portfolios Depressed, Traders Seek Therapy

Boy, those NYT headline writers are a hoot and a half.

Firefighters Attempt to Prevent Floods (washingtonpost.com)

It's a switcheroo!

The Nando Times: Drug companies to give discounts to Caribbean nations

For AIDS drugs. Great news all around, though why did it take this long?

The statistics exclude Cuba, where rigorous isolation and prevention keep infection rates low.

At least, that's what the Cubans say.

Mercury News | 07/06/2002 | Government to step up patrols in airports

Seems pretty reasonable. One has to wonder why they hadn't already.

"Had this event occurred at another airline counter without armed security guards, the situation unfortunately would have been worse,'' the [Transportation Security] agency said.

Oh, I don't think this one would have happened at another airline counter, do you?

Time for another exciting episode of the Space Ghost Group!

SPACE GHOST: Greetings! I am Space Ghost. Today, our guests are:

Captain Euro, the Continent’s foremost socialist superhero;
Dr. Bruce Banner, government research scientist;
Zan of the Wonder Twins, currently in the form of a bucket of icewater, and;
Zorak, Lone Mantis of the Apocalypse.

Issue One, the LAX shooting. Was it terrorism? Zorak!

ZORAK: What a stupid question!

SG: Dr. Banner?

BANNER: If it wasn’t terrorism, then what is? From what I can tell, the government is refusing to call it terrorism for political reasons, but I’m with the Israelis on this. If it’s not terrorism, it will do until something better comes along.

SG: Captain Euro?

EURO: I must compliment the Bush Administration for refusing to use the loaded word “terrorism”. One man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter. I must also complement the FBI for refusing to make any assumptions and instead attempt to find the alleged gunman’s alleged motive.

BANNER: Oh, come on! I don’t think we have to look very hard!

EURO: While I much prefer your presence to the barbarian who sat in that seat previously, I strongly object to your clear bias against Muslims.

BANNER: I’m not prejudiced against Muslims, I’m prejudiced against hatemongers who practice murder out of their own prejudice.

EURO: Look in the mirror, doctor.

BANNER: You’re getting me angry. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry.

EURO: I don’t much like you now!

SG: ENOUGH! Correct answer: Terrorism! Next issue, financial scandals. First Enron, then Global Crossing, now Worldcom looks to go down. Even Xerox has been found to be cooking the books. What is to be done? Zan?

ZAN: Jeez, I don’t know. I’m a teenager and an alien, I don’t understand all this money stuff.

SG: Zorak?

ZORAK: All boards of directors should turn over control of their companies to me!

SG: Yeah, right. Captain Euro?

EURO: Clearly, capitalism has failed. Central planning is the truly civilized solution.

ZORAK: Planned by me!

SG: WRONG! Dr. Banner?

BANNER: Well, I work in the public arena, but I think maybe we could use some more regulation. But socialism surely isn’t the answer.

SG: Correct! Issue three, smallpox vaccinations. Should everyone be vaccinated or should they be reserved for those at risk and then used only in an outbreak? Captain Euro?

EURO: The government surely knows far more about these things than the people. If the commissions studying this say that the vaccinations should be held back, we should trust the experts.

SG: WRONG! Zan?

ZAN: Well, I don’t know a lot about this stuff, but it seems pretty sensible to vaccinate everyone we can, just in case.

SG: Correct! Issue four, the International Criminal Court. Should the United States join? Captain Euro.

EURO: But of course. The ICC is not aimed at the US, and all of these fears are far overblown.

SG: Dr. Banner?

BANNER: If the ICC treaty violates the Constitution, or if we feel our people will be persecuted under it, we need to stay out. It’s a nice idea, admittedly.

EURO: Hah, you Americans and your Constitution. As if it’s something sacred. You should submit for the good of all.

BANNER: It is sacred! And that’s not the only reason.

EURO: Simplistic, ever simplistic. You---

BANNER: Listen, I’m getting tired of the insults. Back off.

EURO: As I was saying before I was interrupted, the United States needs to recognize that it’s nothing special and submit to the world’s will. If maybe some Americans suffer, it’s for the good of all.

BANNER: ROAAARGH! (Changes into the Hulk.)

HULK: Hulk smash Euro-weenie!

EURO: Merda.

HULK: (Smashes Captain Euro.)

SG: Uh, Hulk, you…

HULK: What?

ZORAK: You’re nude!

HULK: OOPSIE! Stupid Banner want look good on TV, no wear stretch polyester pants.

SG: Could somebody get him something to cover himself?

(A stagehand runs up with a king size sheet. HULK wraps it around himself.)

HULK: TOGA! TOGA! TOGA!

ZAN: I don’t get it.

SG: This isn’t going very well. Issue five, predictions. Will the Democrats take back the House? Hulk?

HULK: (Burps, drops bucket.) Huh?

ZORAK: He drank Zan!

SG: Hulk, how could you?

HULK: Sorry. Smashing is thirsty work. (Wanders off holding stomach.) Zan not agreeing with me.

ZORAK: Your show is ruined! (Laughs maniacally.)

SG: (Sighs.) Next week, are we going to invade Iraq or not? Until then, farewell!

(Theme music plays.)

MOLTAR [V/O]: The Space Ghost Group is made possible by a generous grant from Archer Daniel Midlands Corporation, a division of Lexcorp. And by generous support from viewers like you.

(Sound of a toilet flushing.)

SG: Hulk, no!

(Click here for the last episode.)